I Had a Dream

[After I spoke up for what I believed in]

I had this dream.

I was in the chair. And all of you had come to attend. Crimes against society! And it felt so real. I couldn’t see you. Because the glass was one way. But all of you could see me. But I could know everyone was there. I could sense their presence. Mom, dad, siblings, aunts’ n uncles, friends and relatives alike. And there was a plethora of emotions that filled the room. There was hatred. There was grief. Happiness. It was all there. Relief.

I think i got cold feet. I wanted 2 wiggle out. My courage failed me. My body didn’t want to die. My principles were weakening. And yet there was nothing I could do but sit and wait till they gassed my ass to the maker.

I could see despair and hurt on my parents. Disappointment more like it. Regret also perhaps. And somehow I felt thank God I didn’t talk to them after what I last did. At least they didn’t get an opportunity to shout at me and tell me how much they regretted having given birth to me. I still had a happy place with them. The last memory wasn’t that bad with them. And I could feel all my siblings. It’s as thought they could feel what I was going thru. My four best friends were present. Lending support to the five siblings. Saddy, Mitu, Chicks, Nandu. Brave faces.

Also present were those who felt I had wronged them. I could see smiles. Jeers. People who thought I was insane. Alien. Longed 2 see me go. Somehow I felt nothing for them.

I finally went. Without much hoo haa. It was quick. And I tried to see if my soul could see you guys. But it couldn’t. All those talks about you leaving your body and seeing the world, Was all wrong. Anyways, it felt so real. But I was happy that I finally went. I think looking at all the people gathered there it was better that I went than stayed. I felt bad for my parents though. I had tagged them for the rest of their life as " the parents of the guy who spoke up and all...".

And that’s how it ended. And I fell into a sleep that I didn’t want to wake up from. I was hoping that when I awoke I would be elsewhere. But it was the same old room and the same old alarm. Had to get to work.....


Melwyn Abraham to the family in August 2006