So I have been trying to get the creative juices flowing. Hope at least some of you laughed. Because that was my intention. Some must have laughed as they were reading it and some after. She who laughs last thinks slowest so I hope you have the last laugh.
I needed to borrow some money to get through my initial expenses. I learnt an important lesson there. Borrow money from a pessimist, they don't expect it back. And you can go back for seconds. Speaking of which I clocked 13 in my 100 meters. Pretty good considering the amount of people I met on the way as I was running. I am in terrific shape. Most of it is due to the amount of exercises I’ve been doing. Though in the last few days it has kind of reduced. I get enough exercise just pushing my luck with my boss.
This place is great but the loneliness is a killer. Tina you were right. I do miss her. I need someone really bad. (All you single women out there)Are you really bad? Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If she isn't there the first time you need her, chances are you won't need her again. Don’t think I’m getting smart with you. Am I getting smart with you? How would you know? I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either. But I’m sure your day will come. Haven’t you heard, every dog has his day? Then what about the bitches?
Hey did I tell you guys I have girls living with me in the same house? It’s a great learning experience. One good turn gets most of the blankets. Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep. I do miss my ex gf a lot. A lot. But my aim is improving nonetheless. We used to party like crazy. It was always One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. Every time I left her she threatened suicide. If someone with multiple personalities threatens suicide is it considered a hostage situation? But the one important lesson she taught me I’d never forget.
When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows. When women hold off from marrying men, we call it independence. When men hold off from marrying women, we call it fear of commitment. Wow. When a man talks nasty to a woman its Sexual harassment. When a woman talks nasty to a man its $5 a minute. But I know how to please women. It's something that's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Yep it’s Money.
My girl left me. She was too demanding. She always wanted free gifts. Aren't all gifts free? Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Especially if yours is a coed group. So how’s things back home? Hey here is a funny one. What do you call a beautiful girl in India? A tourist. Well I must get back to work now. Trying to hone my leadership skills. Quickly, I must hurry, for there go my people and I am their leader.
I needed to borrow some money to get through my initial expenses. I learnt an important lesson there. Borrow money from a pessimist, they don't expect it back. And you can go back for seconds. Speaking of which I clocked 13 in my 100 meters. Pretty good considering the amount of people I met on the way as I was running. I am in terrific shape. Most of it is due to the amount of exercises I’ve been doing. Though in the last few days it has kind of reduced. I get enough exercise just pushing my luck with my boss.
This place is great but the loneliness is a killer. Tina you were right. I do miss her. I need someone really bad. (All you single women out there)Are you really bad? Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If she isn't there the first time you need her, chances are you won't need her again. Don’t think I’m getting smart with you. Am I getting smart with you? How would you know? I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either. But I’m sure your day will come. Haven’t you heard, every dog has his day? Then what about the bitches?
Hey did I tell you guys I have girls living with me in the same house? It’s a great learning experience. One good turn gets most of the blankets. Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep. I do miss my ex gf a lot. A lot. But my aim is improving nonetheless. We used to party like crazy. It was always One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. Every time I left her she threatened suicide. If someone with multiple personalities threatens suicide is it considered a hostage situation? But the one important lesson she taught me I’d never forget.
When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows. When women hold off from marrying men, we call it independence. When men hold off from marrying women, we call it fear of commitment. Wow. When a man talks nasty to a woman its Sexual harassment. When a woman talks nasty to a man its $5 a minute. But I know how to please women. It's something that's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Yep it’s Money.
My girl left me. She was too demanding. She always wanted free gifts. Aren't all gifts free? Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Especially if yours is a coed group. So how’s things back home? Hey here is a funny one. What do you call a beautiful girl in India? A tourist. Well I must get back to work now. Trying to hone my leadership skills. Quickly, I must hurry, for there go my people and I am their leader.
1 comment:
Enjoyed reading yr blog..not sure if there was a point somewhere in the horizon... But funny in parts...:)
Keep writing!
Cheers
A.
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