You can’t do without them, that is for sure. It exists. If you do want to maintain it then that also is your relationship. They never remain constant. They constantly evolve. But there is one factor that affects all relationships and that is attitude. It is your attitude that will help make or break your relationship. Good times happen because of the stance you take to a particular situation. And during the bad times, your approach decides on whether you drift apart or some closer.
Death for example can take people apart or get them closer. I remember the death of my grandma brought the whole family closer with my sister donning the mantle that ma granny once held. It could have gone wither way. She could have fallen apart and all of us would have also, but the attitude she took saved us all. There is no better feeling that sitting next to the one you love especially in times when you have lost another loved one.
TRUST
Trust is another key ingredient. It’s like a pair of socks. Its gotta be two and it’s got to match. It’s the foundation of any relationship. When you feel betrayed by a particular situation you have to take a look at it objectively and look at the intent behind the actions. Many a time we feel betrayed, and we probably are by our own perspective and expectations but it need not be that someone else betrayed us. That is nothing but your attitude.
UNDERSTANDING
Understanding. Its difficult understanding the word understanding. Very often it’s misunderstood. Your understanding is also based on your attitude. If you take responsibility to ensure that others understand perfectly what you are communicating and you understand perfectly what others are communicating the relationship work pretty smooth.
Many a time we feel incomplete. No man can live as an island they say [though we can definitely live on one]. We feel we are imperfect, and so we're always searching for somebody to perfect us. We get into a relationship. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still incomplete, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising or sometimes with something more promising. It need not be a person. We do share relationships with inanimate objects as well though we may not realize it. Food, TV, Sports, etc. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.”
YOU AND I
I have a few relationships that I consider real important to me. Some of them have existed from the time I was born, some from my childhood, one from my stay here and one in the very recent past. I cannot define them though. I am limited by vocabulary. They are not water tight compartments and often spill in over to another compartment. So I shall not try to define them or set parameters but instead when I refer to them for other people I shall use generic terms like friend, sibling, and colleague so that someone may have a term to put to it. I do not need one.
You know how important you are to me and the very fact that you are reading this means you are already an integral part of my life for life.
Death for example can take people apart or get them closer. I remember the death of my grandma brought the whole family closer with my sister donning the mantle that ma granny once held. It could have gone wither way. She could have fallen apart and all of us would have also, but the attitude she took saved us all. There is no better feeling that sitting next to the one you love especially in times when you have lost another loved one.
TRUST
Trust is another key ingredient. It’s like a pair of socks. Its gotta be two and it’s got to match. It’s the foundation of any relationship. When you feel betrayed by a particular situation you have to take a look at it objectively and look at the intent behind the actions. Many a time we feel betrayed, and we probably are by our own perspective and expectations but it need not be that someone else betrayed us. That is nothing but your attitude.
UNDERSTANDING
Understanding. Its difficult understanding the word understanding. Very often it’s misunderstood. Your understanding is also based on your attitude. If you take responsibility to ensure that others understand perfectly what you are communicating and you understand perfectly what others are communicating the relationship work pretty smooth.
Many a time we feel incomplete. No man can live as an island they say [though we can definitely live on one]. We feel we are imperfect, and so we're always searching for somebody to perfect us. We get into a relationship. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still incomplete, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising or sometimes with something more promising. It need not be a person. We do share relationships with inanimate objects as well though we may not realize it. Food, TV, Sports, etc. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.”
YOU AND I
I have a few relationships that I consider real important to me. Some of them have existed from the time I was born, some from my childhood, one from my stay here and one in the very recent past. I cannot define them though. I am limited by vocabulary. They are not water tight compartments and often spill in over to another compartment. So I shall not try to define them or set parameters but instead when I refer to them for other people I shall use generic terms like friend, sibling, and colleague so that someone may have a term to put to it. I do not need one.
You know how important you are to me and the very fact that you are reading this means you are already an integral part of my life for life.
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RELATIONSHIPS- A BEAUTIFUL PART OF LIFE
FAMILY, FRIENDS, COLLEAGUES - Some of the important bonds of human race to move ahead in life. All these “Relationships” are important for every individual to survive. They help us to live happily and cope up with the daily problems. We often see people saying that a ‘RELATIONSHIP’ is easy to form but very difficult to maintain. Is it true? Is it really difficult to maintain a relationship? Does a relationship always needs to be looked after and taken care of? Today amidst a busy lifestyle everyone is losing interest towards forming good relations. We find more and more break-ups in relations. It has only become an Obligation.
Is a hectic schedule and busy working lifestyle the only reason behind the differences between two individuals? Or is it that people these days give more importance to their own space. Perhaps that’s why most of them want to stay alone. Has relationship lost all its charm? If yes then why? Is it not possible to try and make a relationship beautiful and long lasting? But the million dollar question would be HOW?
In today’s society we see most of the couples working to make both ends meet. This indeed, is the best way to maintain a healthy married life. SHARING EACH OTHER’s RESPONSIBILITY- is the first step of a good bonding. But then what happens once they are back home from work. They are so exhausted that they eat, drink and then go to sleep. Even if there’s time to talk they talk about the day and what happened in the office. That’s where the problem lies. Is that the only topic to be discussed? No. When we say COMMUNICATION IN A RELATIONSHIP, it does not mean to discuss our daily chores. It means to talk about EACHOTHER.
Most of you may think that what I am saying is a bit impractical. But I don’t think so. It’s just a matter of trying once and making it a habit so that both of them feel good about coming back ‘HOME’ from ‘WORK’. Even after coming back if you want to discuss about work then why not meet outside? Mixing of professional and personal life is a major problem. There has to be a difference between them and both should be kept poles apart or else the end result would be an “IMBALANCE”.
Moreover in other relations like FRIENDS and COLLEAGUES, one needs to think beyond SELFISHNESS and ENJOY BEING IN THE COMPANY of others. There should be a “Sense of TOGETHERNESS” rather than UTILITY. Today people consider socializing as an important thing so that they can utilize their contacts when they need. Perhaps we should get out of this mentality and be happy to have different kind of people around us and live in unity so that there is nothing left to complain about.
If we need to achieve a sense of satisfaction from every relationship, an “EFFORT” needs to be made from every individual to make it successful. An Effort -
To Realize each other’s IMPORTANCE,
to be Empathetic,
to be Loving,
to be Appreciating,
to be Tolerant,
to be Interactive,
to be Open-minded,
to be Negotiating,
to be Sharing,
to be Honest with each other,
to be Indulgent,
and last but not the least,
having a desire to make it Permanent.
A relationship makes us complete and makes life ‘MAGNIFICIENT’.
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